Have you ever gotten home from hanging out with someone and you feel like you need a big nap? Or a spa day? Or need to sleep for a year?
Yep. If you know that feeling…
You’ve just dealt with a toxic person.
That’s a really good sign that you’ve just spent time with a draining person.
How Do I Deal With A Toxic Person?
Did you know that Pablo Picasso was an energy vampire?
I found this out while reading Austin Kleone’s book Show Your Work!
I guess Picasso was a toxic person.
Austin Kleon said that most people dealt with it because they liked hanging out with him because he was a famous guy.
But there was a sculptor named Constantin Brancusi who didn’t like Picasso and was unwilling to hang out with/tolerate Picasso’s energy-vampire-ness. He seems like a smart guy, right?
“Brancusi hailed from the Carpathian Mountains, and he knew a vampire when he saw one,” Kleon wrote. “He was not going to have his energy or the fruits of his energy juiced by Picasso, so he refused to have anything to do with him.
He was indeed VERY smart.
If someone leaves you feeling this way, it’s your body telling you that the person you hung out with is an energy thief/energy vampire.
This may be hard if the person is a good friend or a family member, because then you’ll have to see them more often. With friends it might be easier, to let them go if they are very toxic. But when it comes to family, it’s a lot harder.
Now, you have to remember that there is a difference between annoying and toxic. Katy Christian Magazine said “Keep in mind that toxic doesn’t equate to annoying. We all have LOTS of annoying family members, or at least family members with annoying habits. No, toxic is different. It’s poison. It’s insidious. It weaves its way through your life, eating away at your happiness.”
Toxicity is described as the quality of being poisonous or toxic. Just think of Chernobyl and how it was considered toxic. They sectioned the place off and encouraged people to not go there for the longest time.
Is My Family Member Or Friend Truly Toxic?
If your friend or family member are:
- bad for your emotional well-being
- Abusive and hurtful with their words.
- Extremely negative and demeaning.
- Reminds people of past mistakes
- They are unlikely to change or improve.
What Can I Do?
- This might come off as too easy. First off, you can forgive them. But you do not need to accept this behavior if it continues.
- Talk to them and tell them how they are hurting you. Some people will honestly listen and strive to be better so they can have a better relationship with you. But you might cringe at the thought of talking to someone about it, because you know they won’t listen to you or will use it to hurt you down the road.
- Pray for them. Lift them up to the Lord.
- You can choose to spend less time with them. Or no time with them. This isn’t easy or wanted, but sometimes you have to step away from a dangerous relationship. Your health is important too and it’s not alright that they keep treating you this way.
- Keep praying for them. It’s important, because God is the only one that can truly change a person or spark a change in them.
- Equipping Godly Women says “Loving someone well does not mean always playing “nice,” always being the peacemaker, or just letting other people walk all over you. This isn’t love–it’s called enabling.[….] My point here is ONLY that the Bible does not teach us that we need to be super polite, calm and passive to the point of being walked over and enabling others in their sins.“
- Set healthy boundaries with friends and family who are toxic if you still want to see them. (Healthy boundaries can be: limiting visits, visiting on holidays,
Want Other Ways To Deal With Toxic People?
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