Have you ever worried that your long-distance relationship won’t work out? And have people ever made you feel like it wasn’t possible?
There were a few times in my life when people made me feel like I was a lunatic for believing in love across the sea.
I don’t really know why people do this to couples in long-distance relationships. I am here today as proof that long-distance relationships work. My husband and I were in a relationship across the distance for 5 and a half years. We are happily together and in the same country. And we are no longer separated by the ocean. We made it work.
It’s possible for you too. If you are in a long-distance relationship or know someone who is, here are the ABCs to making a long-distance relationship work for you.
The Ultimate A-Z List On Making Your Long-Distance Relationship Work
A. is for Attitude –
A lot of thriving in long-distance relationships comes down to your attitude. How you speak to your loved one and also how you speak about your partner.
How to keep a good attitude:
Every day in a long-distance relationship it’s vital to stay positive with a good attitude. I’d try to look for the positive in the moment that I found myself in. Enjoy the moment you are in—here and now. You only have this day!
B. is for Believe –
You need to believe in your relationship and what you both are working for. There are plenty of people who will try to make you feel like what you are fighting for isn’t worth it. Believe in yourself and your relationship. Know that for certain.
How to believe:
Once I met a person and she asked me why my boyfriend was in Australia. I kindly responded with, “He is finishing up school there.”
“Oh, was he just studying there?”
“No, he actually lives there.” I responded.
“Ohh….” She said, opening her eyes wide. A judge-y look drifted across her face as she said, “Thank goodness my daughter didn’t fall in love with someone when she went abroad.”
When you write these positive affirmations, you’ll end up with a large list of positive affirmations that will help you change your mindset. I’ve found that having affirmations really helps you work towards your goals and dreams!
I Am… Great At Writing Positive Affirmations
See what I did there. I wrote a header as an affirmation. I thought that was crafty.
You know why we should practice writing and speaking our positive affirmations? Because, in life, we give compliments and speak nice words over people around us all the time. Yet, we say some of the worst things to ourselves in the morning when we see our face in the mirror. Isn’t that true?
Just recently I went to a workshop on writing positive affirmations. It was a fun experience to focus on writing a new mindset.
When we sat down to write our affirmations our teacher Nichole Rae encouraged us to write 108 positive affirmations. And why 108? Once of the many reasons to write 108 is because the diameter of the sun is 108 times of the diameter of the earth!
I know you probably aren’t going to like this, but we all have the same amount of time. It comes down to how you spend your time that affects whether you’ll reach your dreams or not.
We All Have The Same Amount Of Time In A Day
How is it that we all have the same amount of time in a day and some get so much done. While, others don’t? It all comes down to strategy and planning your time.
I recently heard someone talking about how you can think about your time as money that is renewed every day, but then taken away at the end of the day. And then in the morning, you are given the same amount again. So you really only have today to chase your dreams. I know, that no one likes talking about this, but we are all going to die someday and we only have one life.
If you were told that tomorrow night would be your last day on planet earth, would you continue to do everything you are doing or not do what you aren’t doing?
That’s when you know that you do have enough time.
Have you ever created a vision board for your life? Your business? or goals? If you have, that’s great! But if not, you should get out your poster board, glue-sticks, and old magazines. It’s one of the best ways to refocus your dreams.
I’ve always found that it’s much easier to chase your dreams, everyday when you have something to remind you of your goals and dreams. That’s where having a vision board comes handy, because you’ll put it someplace that you see it on a daily basis.
How A Vision Board Will Help You Reach Your Dreams
A vision board will help you re-focus your goals. You can do this for the whole year, or for the quarter, or month. Our goals and dreams always change depending on where we’re at and where our goals are at. You can do this by yourself or with friends.
I just recently partook in a Vision Board Girl’s Day Out. We invited a ton of girls and brought scissors, poster board, glue guns, colorful scrapbook paper, and stickers. And then we all sat around the table and dreamed together!
We waste a lot of time on social media. Tell me… it isn’t true? Because I know I spend WAY too much time doing the wrong things on social media. I’m going to walk you through the best practices for writers on social media.
Stop Wasting Time & Make Use Of The Time You Are On Social Media
I recently found, I spend about half an hour scheduling content on each social media, because I like scheduling my content for social media out a ways. If you think of spending 30 minutes on each of your social medias (for me it’s Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, and LinkedIn) so that’s four social networks.
The math says: 4 X 30 mins. That’s 2 hours or more depending on how much time you spend. Now imagine if you spend that much time on social media everyday!
Now if you add that up over a full week, including your weekend the math says that will end up being: 2hrs X 7 = 14 hours a week.
Can you imagine that? In a two week timespan that is almost 30 hours. 30 hours of time on social media!
That’s more than a day that you’ve wasted on social media. Do you really want to spend more than a whole day on social media? I know I don’t. Even though my job has to do with blogging and social media, I still don’t want to be stuck on social media more than I have to be.
If you’re anything like me I bet you’d love to get some tips cutting back on the time that you is being wasted on social media. I’ll also share some social media best practices so that the time that you do focus on social media is time well spent. I’m going to cover the best practices to keep in mind for while you are on social media. I’ll be doing another post for each of the different social networks with best practices and targeted tips for those social media platforms.
You can do this for your whole day actually. Start out by writing the hours of the days and you can also divide the day out in half hour increments. Track everything. Track your time spend getting ready in the morning, writing blog posts, chores, and the 10-30 minutes spent scrolling on social media as well.
It’s super important to have a blog content strategy. You can do this by having a content scheduling meeting every month. It’s important to have these meetings if you are a solo-preneur or a small team or a bigger company, because your content is going to reflect your brand and blog to your readers or customers.
It’s never fun to feel stuck when it comes to writing your newest blog post. It can also be hard to plan a month or year’s worth of content. When that happens it feels like an Olympic sport just to get out a sentence you actually like. After a little while it feels like that blinking cursor is tormenting you.
And then on top of that, throw in a fast-approaching deadline. It makes it even more difficult. In a way it might feel like writer’s block. But let me tell you something — I don’t really believe there is such thing as writer’s block. It’s more of a combination of bad blog planning and procrastination. At least it is for me. I’ve collected about 200 blog prompt ideas.
End The Curse Of The Blinking Cursor – How To Come Up With A Year Of Creative Blog Post Ideas
So, instead of being tormented by that blinking cursor, I thought I’d share some of my best tips for coming up with great blog content that your readers are going to love.
Remember if the blog writing muse pulls you in another direction, remember these are just blog ideas. Follow your audience and make sure it’s something they’d enjoy. Don’t just write about something because it’s on this list. Make sure it fits your blog and audience.
First Off, How Often Are You Going To Publish Blog Posts?
Before you figure out your your blog ideas, it’s important to decide how often you’ll be publishing content on your blog.
Once you decide if you are going to publish once a week, twice a week, or twice a month it’d be good to find a day where you can sit down and bulk write the blog posts. You’ll also know how many posts you’ll need to write a week or per month.
And if you are starting out, or restarting a blog you want to keep consistently it’s good to figure out a schedule where you can write a lot of content over a short period.
Starting out, I chose to write two days in a row, for a couple hours each day. This helped me get a lot of writing out.
It’s a bad habit. I tend to let energy vampires drain me of my creative energy. Do you have this problem too? It’s not a secret or habit I like. It’s something I’ve been learning to guard against. It’s important that you don’t let them do this to you, your creativity, or your business. Because these energy vampires are lurking in every area of your life.
Energy Vampires Are A Real Thing
Everyday people deal with them, but so did artists from long ago. There was a sculptor by the name of Constantin Brâncuși and he knew Picasso. But from what I read, it almost sounds like he wish he hadn’t known him. He is known for saying, “Picasso is a cannibal,”
After spending any amount of time with Picasso, anyone who was present was bound to be worn out, while Picasso made off with their energy. He’d go to his studio and live off his victim’s energy.
Has anyone ever copied you? It’s not a nice feeling to have a part of you mimicked by someone else. It isn’t fun to have your soul yanked out of you and then acted upon by someone who isn’t you, isn’t fun.
Keep reading to find out some helpful tips on how to deal with copycats.
How To Deal With Your Copycat
You are unique. Be confident in it. Take a stand for who you are.
“A man who stands for nothing, will fall for anything.” -Malcolm X
1. Don’t share secrets with your copycat.
This may be hard, especially depending on how close you are to the copycat.
You have to think whether it’s really worth sharing your ideas with them. I’ve chatted with people about writing ideas before and a few days later I find out that they are writing something a little too similar to my story, which isn’t fun.
Sometimes it’s just not worth it.
So from experience, If they ask you about your story don’t tell them about it. If they asked you where you got your shirt, be discreet and say you don’t remember.
2. Sell yourself the BEST you can
If your copycat tries copying things that you are doing or something you are creating, don’t let them sell it better than you.
It was your idea originally. Be the unique person you are and sell the idea the best you can. They won’t be able to stand a fighting chance. Since you are the one who got the ideas in the first place. There is only one – you!
3. Encourage them in their own uniqueness
Maybe you are shopping with them and see some awesome clothes that you want to get, but you know if you point it out in front of them they’ll buy it before you can even say “But, I was picking that out for me.”
Point out outfits you think might look nice on your them. Say things like “Wow, this outfit would look amazing on you!” or “Green really makes your eyes pop.” You’ll find that they’ll eat all your compliments up.
When you do this, you are helping them see what is unique and original about themselves. I believe sometimes that copycats have a tough time identifying their uniqueness, because they are always trying to be someone else. Then when they are in the dressing room trying it on go get the clothes you wanted to try on.
4. Which kind of copycat do you have?
There are a few different kinds of copycats: One is nicer to deal with, while the other can be a thorn in your side. But those two can admire you or be jealous of you for either your appearance or your ideas or even both.
One just admires you. For this kind of copycat, try to be gentle and kind. Encourage them in finding and showing off their own unique person.
While the other is just jealous of you. For this copycat, if you can, try drop them. They really aren’t good for your health or well-being. I know it can be hard, especially if you have a relative who is this kind of copycat.
Have a relative like this copycat? If they bring you down and make you feel horrible, I recommend trying not to see them as often as you need to. When you do see them, just keep your mouth shut and smile. That will bother them. If you do anything, encourage them in the things that might make them unique.
Appearance Thief: This one wants to be you, when it comes to your style and personality.
Idea Thief: The idea thief loves your ideas so much that they want them for themselves.
5. If nothing works… talk to them
Sometimes the only thing you can do is talk to your copycat. If you’ve tried other things, but it doesn’t work you may just have to talk to them straight up.
Sit down and talk to them. Tell them that you didn’t appreciate it. And then distance yourself from them.
How Do I Talk To Them?
Sitting down to confront your copycat can be scary.
Here are some helpful things to tell them:
It really bothers me that you copied me _________________ (State the time).
You are a unique and creative person. I just don’t understand why you feel like you have to copy me. I love __________, _____________, and ________________ (name characteristics about them that you love or see could be great if they focused on it.) about you!
I really love you as a friend, but I can’t continue to hang out with or talk to you about these things because you just steal my ideas and I don’t appreciate that at all. So if you can’t stop copying me, I can’t be your friend anymore. (If they stole your idea and don’t want to stop copying you, you might have to tell them something like this. It may be difficult.)
The First Copy-Cat, That I Remember
I encountered a copy-cat for the first time (I believe) when I was in 5th grade when I was sitting on the bus with my best friend. We were bundled in our fluffy winter jackets with our backpacks at our feet as we spoke. I was so excited to show my friend an idea I had. I trusted her. Of course, she wouldn’t steal my ideas. I reached into my unzipped backpack and brought out a small locked journal.
This was one of the first times I chose to share something I had written with someone other than a teacher or my parents. I opened the clasped journal with a kitty on it. I flipped the page to the spot I wanted to show her. Small pictures of little fairy people who I’d drawn along with a story that went along with it.
She got onto the bus the next day and then she showed me a picture she had drawn. She said, “Devin, I am writing a story too.” A hint of panic struck my stomach. She wasn’t the type to write stories or draw. Her story was identical to my story. I didn’t think this kind of thing could happen. While looking at her drawing on the paper, it was an exact replica of the drawing in my story.
When I saw the picture she’d drawn a hint of panic struck through me and curdled my stomach. Her story was identical to mine and the pictures of the fairies resembled mine. At that young age, I experienced the fear that came along with someone stealing your ideas or work.
This is something that I never thought would be possible. I thought everyone had their own unique ideas and that they wouldn’t ever think of stealing other people’s ideas. I sure know I wouldn’t.
We all know that when it comes to real life, that Hollywood movies are fun to watch, but that they aren’t really realistic especially when it comes to long-distance relationships. I know from experience. So I wanted to shed some light on the truths behind these lies.
Why You Shouldn’t Get Discouraged By Hollywood’s Lies about Long-Distance Relationships
…And long story short, we thrived in and out of our long-distance relationship. Of course there were ups and downs. We made it work. That’s the important thing. I want to encourage you to ignore the lies about long-distance relationships that the world tries throwing at you, because more than anything it’s just going to discourage you.
What you need to do instead, is listen to those who have gone before you. I’m here to guide you, hold your hand, and chat with you over a chai latte in a coffee shop to tell you it’s normal and that you don’t have to listen to the lies. I totally care about you and your relationship.